


Twins

by ChibyL



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Family Drama, Fights, Football Player Harry, Football Player Niall, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Insecure Louis, Louis in Glasses, M/M, Twin!nouis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-04
Updated: 2016-11-08
Packaged: 2018-05-31 07:20:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6461053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChibyL/pseuds/ChibyL
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis and Niall are twins, they used to be friends, but at some point they grew apart. </p><p>They share their house, but they don't talk anymore, they have their own lives and their own friends.</p><p>Things begin to change when they are forced to spend more time together. Could this be their chance to start to know each other and maybe find their friendship again?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

" _You're in, Niall_."

It was a simple statement but it was enough to make their lives change forever.

Louis and Niall had always been together since the moment they were born or maybe it was even before, when they were in their mom's belly. They always did things together and where there was one of them, there was the other one.

It was almost natural that they had tried out football together and it had been shocking that, for the first time, it was just one of them achieving something.

Niall had been glad to be the one who made it on the team, not even once he had wished it was the other way around, not even when he had seen Louis' heartbroken expression when Harry, the team captain, had told him he was too out of shape to be on the team. On the other hand, Louis had been happy for his brother, especially when he had seen his proud expression, he just couldn't join him in being so cheerful when he was the one who had been left out.

The evening after the tryouts they had spoken about it.

" _You're in now."_

_"We have always done things together."_

_"So you are not joining?"_

_"Do you want me not to?"_

_"Of course not. You're in, that's great."_

_"We're still fine then?"_

_"Sure_."

They aren't anymore.

Neither Louis or Niall could tell what happened, but something had cracked after that night.  
­

It has been two years now and slowly they have grown apart to the point where they barely talk.

Louis hasn't been to one of Niall's games, he didn't even go today. He'd rather just stay at home and watch TV or drown in his sadness in his room. Right now he was sitting on his bed, his legs curled under himself, his back resting against the wall. He was talking on the phone with one of his friends, or even better, he was listening to his friend complaining about the new photographer of their school newspaper, when he hears voices downstairs.

Instantly he turns to the clock on his nightstand and he is pretty sure Niall's game wasn't supposed to end this early.

"See you tomorrow," Louis snaps, not caring about what Liam, his friend, is saying anymore. Liam knows too well that it's better not to ask when it's about his family, so he just says goodbye and lets him go. Louis sighs, slipping under the sheets and pretends to be asleep. Honestly? He doesn't want to hear his dad tell Niall how good he played. He used to have dinner with family after every match, but after a couple of months he had just stopped pretending he was okay with his dad always telling Niall how good he was and ignoring him. He quickly grabs his ear buds from the drawer next to his bed and shut the world away. If he's lucky, he'll wake up late next morning and he'll be able to go to school without talking to anyone.

Well, when has he ever been lucky?

Louis wakes up next morning with Niall still asleep on the bed next to him, so he slowly rolls out of bed, trying not to wake his brother up and makes his way downstairs, rubbing sleep off his eyes.

"Hi, Lou," his mom greets, placing a warm kiss on his forehead, "What are you doing already up?"

Louis blinks, his tired brain doing it's best to figure out if it's Sunday and if he forgot or maybe it was spring break, but no, he is pretty sure it's a normal day. "Going to school?" he asks shrugging.

"Oh, no Lou. I was sure Niall or dad had told you. You have to stay home today," she says and when she spots his confused expression she adds, "See, Niall hurt himself yesterday. You don't have to worry, it's nothing too serious, but he can't really walk right now. Your dad is already at work and I have to go soon. You have to take care of your brother."

Louis lets her talk, pretending to actually care about Niall being injured, but as soon as she closes her mouth he shakes his head, "I have a test today, I can't skip school."

"Come on, Lou," his mom whines, turning to the counter top and focusing on fixing breakfast, "You are a straight A student, I am pretty sure your teacher won't complain for missing a test. Your brother needs you."

Louis grunts, "I was sick last week and you left me here alone. Why do I have to baby Niall now?" He couldn't help his harsh tone, it has always been like this. Apparently their parents are sure Louis can take care of himself, while Niall always needs someone to be there for him. Louis would be glad to think it's his parents' way to show how much they trust him, but he is too tired to pretend. He needs them, more than Niall maybe. He just doesn't know how to show it.

"Louis, it's not up for discussion. Besides, you had the flu, your brother has hurt his knee. He can't walk so he needs help if he wants a glass of water or something," she explains, giving him a plate with two toasts and a glass of juice, "Now please bring him his breakfast and behave. I have to go."

"So basically I am his slave for the day," Louis states, loud enough to be heard, even if his mom pretends to miss his words. She kisses him again and goes away, annoyingly ruffling his hair with her gentle hand.

Fine. Maybe deep down Louis could actually worry for his brother if just for once someone would care about him too. But of course he is asking for too much.

So Louis puts on his brave face and heads upstairs, not even bothering to fix himself his own breakfast. He wasn't hungry anyway.

He pushes the door open without a word. Niall is awake and now that Louis focuses on him he can see that Niall's leg is bandaged, propped up on a pillow. Maybe he was actually asleep when they went upstairs, or the music was too loud for Louis to hear his brother coming in, he doesn't want to know really. He's glad he wasn't listening when his dad told Niall how sad he was and how much the school would suffer for him sitting out a couple of matches. Because surely his dad told him that.

"Here, mom said have a good day." Louis mumbles, placing the plate on Niall's stomach and leaving the glass next to the lamp before sitting on his own bed.

"Thanks?" Niall replies unsurely, trying to sit up without jostling his body too much "What are you doing here? There's math test today."

"Mom said I had to watch you and be your slave for the day."

"Look, Lou I don't want to argue with you right now. I am quite pissed off at the moment and I am in pain and­-"

"Yeah, about that, what happened to your leg?"

Niall sighs, looking at the wall behind Louis' back. There is his name, written in a nice shade of green. Louis painted it years ago since Niall can't really draw and Louis had decorated it with a nice quatrefoil. Yeah, nice old days, Louis thinks bitterly. "I dislocated it, when number 13 knocked me down. The doc said there isn't really a chance that I can play the rest of the season, but I have to wait till tomorrow to see a specialist so I really don't know."

"I'm sorry," Louis mumbles and he is, honestly. The fact that Niall and him aren't on the best terms doesn't mean he can't be sad for him; the fact that he is glad that he won't hear his whole family talk about football anymore doesn't mean that he doesn't feel sorry for Niall losing the best thing he had. He would have been happy to know that Niall was off the pitch for a couple of matches... but the whole season? That's fucked up.

"Yeah, it sucks. Can't even stand on it and my wrist hurt so I can't use crutches," he explains, showing his bandaged left hand with a pained expression as he uses the right one to pick at his toast. "Where's your breakfast?"

"Not hungry," Louis replies, crossing his legs under himself and looking at his phone. They are done with their talk for now, so Louis focuses on Liam's whatsapp conversation, biting on his lower lip, unsure of what he is supposed to tell him. He doesn't want to complain about Niall but he has to talk to someone.

Niall just sighs, eating in silence, wishing he had his own phone next to him. He won't ask Louis to give it to him, he doesn't want to talk to his brother more than necessary, so he tries to busy himself with one of the books on the shelf next to his bed, the only thing he can reach from his spot.

The silence between them is rather uncomfortable, but it's nothing Niall wasn't used to. So he just pretends to read for a while, then he puts the book away and tries to sleep. His knee had been bothering him all night, he hasn't really slept and he feels impossibly tired.

At some point his phone rings and Niall grins inside, well aware that now Louis has a reason to bring it to him without Niall actually asking for it. In fact he slowly watches as his brother makes his way to the gym bag abandoned in the corner of the room, bringing it to Niall without a word and Niall just has to grab the phone from the pocket on its right side and check who is calling.

"'Lo?"

"Niall, you aren't in school."

"Really Haz? Hadn't noticed," Niall rolls his eyes, looking at Louis, still standing next to him. "Need something?"

"What? No. I'll be downstairs. Yell if you need me," Louis rushes out, leaving Niall slightly confused.

He talks to Harry for about ten minutes, but then he has to hang up since his friend has classes to attend.

By now he is well aware he needs to go to the loo and he also knows he can't make it on his own. "Louis?" he yells, but no one answers. "Lou?" he tries again. "Fuck you, you idiot." Niall quickly deals Louis' number and calls him. He still remembers it from when they used to call each other, even if he hasn't used it in years.

"Niall?"

"Could you _please_ come upstairs?" Niall asks, stretching on the please and quitting the call before Louis has a chance to reply.

Two seconds and his brother is there. "What now?"

"I ­ uhm ­I have to use the bathroom."

Louis blinks, wondering what exactly Niall wants him to do and Niall has to admit it out loud. "Louis, could you help me walk there? Come on, why do you always have to be so difficult?"

"Difficult? Me?"

"Seriously, it's not the right time, Louis. You can whine once my bladder is empty, okay?"

It's Louis' time to roll his eyes, but after a moment he approaches the bed and stretches his hand out for Niall to take it. "Let's go."

Niall sighs but in the end he manages to stand up on his own, quickly grabbing his brother's shoulder to balance himself. They hadn't been so close in ages and Niall finds it impossibly awkward. If he wasn't such in a rush he would have noticed how weird it is to feel the bone of Louis' shoulder under his fingers.

They try to take a step like that but Niall feels like he could fall in a minute. He doesn't know if it's just because he doesn't trust Louis at all, or maybe because he looks like he could break under Niall's weight. "Okay, this is not working." Niall sighs, pushing himself off his brother and sitting on the edge of the bed.

"What am I supposed to do?" Louis asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Just hand me the crutch," Niall sighs, pointing to the crutches next to their desk.

"If you had crutches why did you-­"

"I can't use my left arm, idiot. You still have to help me, but I won't break you in half. Shit," he curses, trying to rub his sore knee. He should keep it elevated all the time and putting it down hurts. He feels like crap and why in the hell couldn't his mom stay at home today? Why did she have to leave him with Louis?

His brother shyly hands him the crutch and Niall finally manages to make his way to the bathroom, holding his weight between the crutch and his brother.

Dutifully, Louis waits for him out of the door and brings him back to the bed.

Once Niall is sitting again he can finally notice how tired his brother looks. He is actually panting. And fuck, Niall is the one who hobbled the whole way with his knee screaming in pain at the harsh movement, yet it's Louis the one who is desperately trying to catch his breath.

"Sit down before you pass out, idiot." Niall tells him harshly, almost mocking him for being so fragile, but before he has ended his sentence, Louis is already heading downstairs and at this point Niall decides he won't bother him for the rest of the day. He tries to find a comfortable position, deciding that no matter how many times he shifts on the bed, it will still hurt. It's not his fault that tears are slowly rolling down his cheeks. If anything he can pretend it's because of the pain, and it has nothing to do with how frustrated he feels at the moment.

Louis, on the other hand, sits on the couch, cursing at himself for being so weak. He checks with his hand under his shirt, trying to feel the bruise on his ribcage only to find out that touching it hurts even more. He shuts his phone off and falls asleep in a matter of minutes, only waking up when his mom comes back from work.

The only good news of the day for both boys is that tomorrow their mom is going to stay at home and take Niall to the doctor.

That means that Louis can go to school without having to take care of his brother and Niall can finally know what's wrong with his damn leg and spend the day without his brother around.

That's fucking great.


	2. Liam

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall meets Louis' friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the very very impossibly long wait. Hope you like this chapter!
> 
> But before we get into the story, just so you know... NOTHING IS WHAT IT SEEMS. Keep this in mind the whole story, or you'll think I am crazy at some point.
> 
> That said, enjoy!

Niall is forced to spend the next few days at home, partly because he has to do a few check - ups,  and because his mom doesn't like the idea of him walking too much, since every time he tries to take more than a few steps his leg hurts so bad it actually brings tears to his eyes.

 

He has a cruciate ligament injury which means that he needs to have surgery on his knee, however no appointments have been made yet. The doctor just gave him a brace and scheduled an awful lot of other appointments for now. For the whole time Niall has tried his best to pretend he is okay. Well, he is not. He is scared to death, scared because he has never had surgery before, scared because he doesn't want to be in the hospital, and scared not to be able to walk anymore. And he misses football. He is so anxious that he has been spending most of his time on his phone, googling about knee surgeries but not opening any links, too afraid to read or see anything about it. He even tried to watch a YouTube video about knee surgery, but his head started to spin even before the surgery started, so he shut his phone off.

 

His left wrist still hurts and according to the doctor it will for another couple of days. But at least, and even if it’s just for a few steps, he can manage to walk on his own - balancing between his good leg and his crutch - and it's enough to make him feel less dependent from everyone else. It's not enough to make his mom stop fussing around him though.

 

That's why when he finally goes back to school on Thursday, Louis still has to be his shadow all day, much to his disappointment. 

 

They don't have many classes in common but their mom begged the two of them to stay together as much as possible, so Louis walks with Niall in the hallway, offering his shoulder for support as they did the first day and carrying his bag. 

 

Why can't Harry help him? Niall tried to tell his mom he'd be fine with his friend helping him out, but she doesn't trust him. She trusts Louis better and Niall can't tell her how wrong she is. He is pretty sure Louis would be glad to make him fall, if he had a chance to. And yes, maybe sometimes Niall has bean mean to his brother, and he might have done a few things he regrets now, like preferring to spend his time with his team rather than his brother, or laughing at him when someone broke his glasses in PE once. But he regrets it! And Niall knows Louis is actually glad he is hurt. That's why he doesn't want to spend time with him right now.

 

So here he is, sitting in the empty art class, waiting for Louis to come so they can go have lunch, while Harry whines, “If your brother doesn't show up in the next three seconds I am leaving you here, Niall.”

 

“You can go if you want to, Haz.” Harry has been kind enough to wait with him, but his patience has a limit and Niall understands it.

 

Art class is between the cafeteria and History class, where Louis is, that's why they are waiting here, just like Niall's mom asked him to and Niall wonders why he agreed to it in the first place, he had to have been high on pain killers.

 

“I’ll wait. It's just - Come on, Niall! Why can't you come? I am here, you don't need him. It's not like he can be that helpful anyways, is your mom blind or something?”

 

Niall doesn't really get what Harry means, he is probably referring to Louis being everything but strong enough to actually help, he doesn't care at the moment. His knee hurts and Harry's loud voice is making him angry. And he is hungry. “Drop it, Haz.”

 

“I still don’t get why you are waiting!”

 

“Because my idiot of a brother would tell mom,” Niall tries to reason, “And if she’d know I have been left alone she’d decide to make me stay at home tomorrow, and then she'd never stop pestering me.”

 

Harry nods, walking back and forth, and then he stops again. “Okay, but what's taking him so long? He probably forgot about you!”

 

“I don't know, Haz.” Niall sighs, rubbing his knee in distress.

 

“Sorry I am late,” Louis pants, finally making it.

 

“What took you so long?” Harry asks, towering in front of Louis and crossing his arms over his chest.

 

Now, Niall and Louis are the same height and Niall is a few inches shorter than Harry. It has never been a problem, Niall is fit enough to feel comfortable next to Harry, while Louis looks impossibly small compared to the curly lad, and he stares at him almost frightened. It's quite cute in Niall's opinion, but he is pretty sure if he was in Louis’ shoes he wouldn’t feel cute, he'd feel rather embarrassed. 

 

So he steps in the conversation, saving his brother from further embarassment, “Would you mind going now?”

 

Louis nods, carefully picking Niall’s backpack and throwing it over his shoulder, next to his own, then he gives Niall his hand, pulling him by his arm until he is standing and Niall dutifully throws his arm around Louis’ shoulders, trying to hold all his weight on his good leg and the crutch he has on his left. He still doesn't trust Louis enough to fully lean on him, besides Harry is probably right, Niall doesn't think Louis would actually be able to keep him up, even if he tried.

 

Harry stares at them for a couple of seconds, licking his lips with his tongue, the way he always does when he tries not to laugh at something. Shrugging, Harry rolls his eyes and grabs Niall's other crutch from the ground. “You can give me his back pack, you know?” he tells Louis.

 

“Well, I'd rather give you all of him,” Louis snaps and Niall wonders why his brother is always so fucking angry. 

 

“I am still here, you idiot. And I'd rather spend the day with Harry than you. So thank you for being around,” he ends ironically.

 

Louis rolls his eyes, but in the end he agrees on Harry’s plan and gives him Niall’s backpack. Harry takes Louis’ one too without a word, so Niall just squeezes Louis’ shoulder harder, prompting him to walk. They don’t really talk much during the walk, it's mostly Niall trying to talk to Harry and ignore his brother, and Louis absently nodding once in a while, even if Niall has a feeling he is nodding at himself, not caring about Niall’s speech.

 

Niall directs them to the table he and Harry usually sit at, with some of the other football players and Louis dutifully takes him there.

 

“You sittin’ here?” Harry asks when Louis stands awkwardly in front of them once they are all set.

 

“Uhm…”

 

Louis doesn't answer, startled from a body almost crashing into his own. 

 

“Loubear!” the guy who crashed against Louis yells, throwing his arm around Louis’ shoulders and fake - punching him with his other arm.

 

Louis smiles and Niall watches the whole scene with an appalled face. He had never seen Louis so happy to see someone in what feels like ages. He is actually smiling, leaning against the other man in the same way he used to do with Niall once. Louis used to be the kind of person who loves body contact, Niall recalls. He hugged everyone in sight, he likes his personal space too much now.

 

“Sorry to make you wait, Lou. Miss Tanderbraum didn't want to let go of me. Ready to go?”

 

Louis looks back at Niall and Niall does his best to look not so interested in his brother’s conversation. “Are you okay there?” Louis asks.

 

“Why don't you eat here?” Niall finds himself asking and even Harry gives him a weird look. Here? With them?

 

Louis chews on his cheek staring at the table, “I don't think it's a good idea.”

 

“You'll be fine, Lou. Let's stay here!” Louis’ friend cheers, plopping down in front of Niall and pulling the hem of Louis’ shirt to make him do the same. 

 

Louis still seems so unsure but in the end he sits between his brother and friend, as close as he can to his friend, actually.

 

“So, you are Niall, right?” the guy asks with the cutest smile Niall has ever seen and Niall just stares at him, until Harry nudges him with his elbow.

 

“He is. And I am Harry.”

 

“Liam. Nice to meet you. Sorry about your injury,” Liam keeps talking, once again only focusing on Niall, while Louis plays with his fingers.

 

“Okay, since we are done with this awkward eye game, who's hungry? Because I am!” Harry says, grabbing his sandwiches from his backpack and Niall does the same.

 

“What are you eating?” Liam asks, stroking his hand on Louis’ thigh and Louis shakes his head, looking down.

 

“Not hungry, really.”

 

Niall stares at the two of them a bit perplexed. What's this closeness now? Is there something between cutie and his brother? Why does it bother him anyway?

 

Liam sighs, staring at the sandwich in his hands, “Want to try this? It's… kind of light, but I think you might like it. Mom made too much of them anyways.” he explains, picking another sandwich from his bag and giving it to Louis.

 

“Liam, I am fine,” Louis says, and Niall knows him to well to miss how uncomfortable he is. He'd pay gold to know what's on his brother’s mind right now.

 

“What's wrong?” Niall asks almost automatically, chewing on his food.

 

Louis doesn't even aknowledge him, all his attention on Liam, the two of them still exchanging a weird look. After a moment or two Liam seems to win the battle as Louis leans forward willingly taking a bite of Liam’s food.

 

“Like it?” Liam asks before Louis has even chewed on it, but Louis nods anyway. “Great. You can have it.”

 

Louis accepts the food, eating it slower then Niall remembers, but than again they don't eat together so often. Now that Niall thinks about it, they never eat together anymore, while once they used to have eating contests almost every evening, much to their mom’s disapproval.

 

Niall’s thoughts are interrupted when his phone goes off. It's a text from Harry and instantly Niall turns his face to him, wondering why he texted him when they are sitting next to each other. Harry is not looking at him though so Niall opens the text and reads it.

 

\- Your brother anorexic or what? - it says and Niall stares at it with wide eyes. Anorexic? Louis? Of course no. Right?

 

Now that he gives him a better look, Louis does look way too skinny and he didn't want to eat until Liam forced him to. He is barely chewing on his food anyway. But it can't be, it's just Harry trying to be an idiot, that's for sure.

 

“So, uhm… Liam, what do you do here? I have never seen you before,” Harry says at some point, probably just because he is bored.

 

“Weird,” Liam replies and it looks like he is not so happy to talk to Harry, “Because I have been here for a year and half now. And I have seen you plenty of times.”

 

“We don't share any classes,” Harry states, it looks like he is thinking about it, trying to remember Liam’s face from somewhere, but nothing comes up.

 

“I am older than you, actually. That's why we don't share any class.”

 

That catches Niall's attention, “How do you know my brother then?” Louis doesn't have many friends, he had guessed Liam was his classmate.

 

“Liam is the editor of the school newspaper, which you'd know if you'd actually read it,” Louis replies, wrapping the uneaten half sandwich in a napkin and crossing his arms over his chest.

 

Louis joined the school paper when he failed with football. The first time one of his articles had been published on it he had bought it home, Niall vaguely remembers. Mom had read it, but Niall and their dad where talking about practice. Niall is not sure if after that Louis had talked about it or not. He had never paid attention, but honestly, it had always looked so boring, how could it be considered his fault? Why does he feel guilty in the first place, if no one is judging him? Oh yeah, because Liam's eyes tell a lot about how much he is judging him.

 

He must have lost himself in his thoughts because when he focuses again, Liam and Louis are talking between the two of them and Harry is texting someone, probably some teammates asking why they are sitting in front of them and not with them.

 

“I don't like him!” Liam says and it feels like he is repeating the sentence for the second or third time.

 

Louis smiles at him, tilting his head to the left, “Come on, his pictures are not that bad, Li!”

 

“I don't care about pictures!”

 

“He is a photo reporter,” Louis states as a matter of fact.

 

“And he is annoying!”

 

“What's a photo reporter?” Niall asks, and three pairs of eyes look at him as he had grown a second head.

 

“Why do you care?” Harry asks and Niall wonders why they are even friends if Harry has to always embarass him like this. It doesn't matter because Niall knows that Harry has just been quicker, if he hadn't said that, Louis would have.

 

Instead his brother answers, actually trying to be polite. “It's the one who takes photos and adds them to the article. I don't even know why we have one, we don't need a lot of photos, since most of the articles aren't about something you can-:

 

“We don't have one apparentely. I am firing Luke today.”

 

Louis sighs, trying to explain that it's not actual firing, this isn't a job and they aren't working! But Niall doesn't care. “Wait” he asks instead, “You have to work on the damn paper today? How am I supposed to go home?”

 

“I don't know Niall,” Louis shrugs, “Call mom?”

 

“Mom is working and you know that, idiot. Come on, can't you skip for today?”

 

“I can't skip just because Mister I am too lazy even to wait here is bored! Suck it up or find your way home! Let's go, Liam.”

 

“Eh! You should take me to-”

 

“Find somebody else, Niall. I am tired of you using me like this. I tried to be helpful, I did. But I can't stand this, I really can't.” it looks like Louis is fighting back tears and Niall almost slaps himself for even trying to reason with his brother. What's the point? He is always so melodramatic, making a scene over everything.

 

If there is someone who should be acting like that it's Niall. He is the one whose leg is screaming in pain, but he doesn't complain, because he is trying his best not to be a burden. Now, the only thing he asked was to go home and rest, and of course Louis had to make it look like he is the bad guy.

 

Liam shrugs at Niall, waving goodbye and following his friend out of the room, leaving Harry and Niall alone.

 

“You taking me home right?” 

 

“Uhm…” Harry mumbles, looking away and shifting uncomfortably in his chair, “There is practice today, Ni.”

 

Shit. He totally forgot it.

 

“Fucking great.”

 

\---

 

Louis heaves, leaning against the bathroom wall, closing his eyes tight in the hope to shut the world out. “I hate him so fucking much.”

 

Liam sighs, rubbing his friend’s shoulder, “Actually he is better than how you portrayed him, you know?”

 

“To you, maybe.”

 

“He had a point, Louis. He is probably bored of waiting for you all day and you could have been nicer.”

 

“I walked back and forth the whole day because of him and he called me an idiot.”

 

“Look, Lou, what did we say? Don't care about him, yeah? Think about better things.”

 

Louis gives him a half smile. “Like what?”

 

It has always been like this, Liam is the only one who had the power to calm him down, from the first time they met. 

 

“Like tonight, maybe?” Liam tells him, “You still up for it, right?”

 

“Of course.”

  
  



	3. Accidentally

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things gets a bit messed up and I don't really want to spoiler anything else!

Niall chews on his lower lip, staring at the same page he has been looking at for the past forty-five minutes, pretending to be studying.

When he actually is just thinking.

He has been spending time with Louis lately - he'd say his mom had forced him to, but honestly he is okay with that. Well as long as he gets a chance to stay with Liam, who follows Louis like his shadow and Niall wonders how come he had never aknowledged his existence until a few days ago.

Most of the times Louis invites Liam over just because they always have somewhere to go, but Louis has to take Niall home before they can leave, and other times they hang inside too. Niall thinks it's because now that Liam has met Niall there is no reason to hide him anymore.

To be honest Niall hasn't really spoken to Liam,  or at least he hasn't said more than a few words to him, basic small talk, but he likes hearing him talk to Louis, he is always so nice and Niall thinks he is slightly developing a crush on him.

He figures it's okay since he knows Liam and Louis are not a thing.

“Lou, can I ask you a question?” Niall had asked one day.

“You already did.”

“Are you and Liam..  you know?”

“Liam is just my  best friend. Besides you already know who my crush is.”

“You still like him then?”

Louis had shrugged it off and Niall had dropped the subject, wondering if Louis had realized Niall's interest in Liam yet or not.

Niall snaps his book close as soon as he hears Louis’ voice coming from down the hallway. It's Monday and he had a meeting for the school newspaper, now they can finally go home, and by “they” he means himself, Louis and Liam.

As soon as he gets in, he hobbles to the couch and sits there sighing in relief, as he can finally get some rest, he tries to shut his brother’s annoying voice out as he calls for their mom, going in the kitchen, only to come back with a piece of paper in his hands.

“This was on the fridge,” he explains. It's their mom's handwriting, Niall doesn't even bother reading it.

It says that she had to go somewhere and Louis has to wait for her before doing whatever he has been planning to do. And that Niall should rest. Her notes always say that.

“We can go tomorrow, Louis. It's okay,” Liam tries, taking the note from Louis’ hands and throwing it in the bin since he now knows where it is.

“I'm gonna call her, maybe she won't take long,” Louis says, leaving the room with his phone already pressed against his ear.

That leaves Niall and Liam alone, the latter awkwardly standing in the middle of the room, while Niall tries to find a comfortable position. Hard task when he feels everything but comfortable being here alone with Liam.

“Liam?”

“What?”

“I'm… uh, I was wondering… Do you think my brother is anorexic?” Niall asks out of the blue.

Liam stares at him, moving a few steps in Niall's direction, “Why do you suddenly care?” he asks crossing his arms over his chest, towering over him and Niall has never felt so small in his life.

“I don't know. Maybe I do. So, is he?”

“He is not,” Liam states and they fall silent again.

Niall chews on his cheek, trying to think about something else to ask him, not really sure of what he can talk about with Liam without feeling like a complete idiot. At some point his train of thoughts was interrupted by Liam himself.

“You know what? He is not, but he was so close to it and you'd have realized it if you weren't so focused on yourself,” Liam snaps, “But I guess it doesn't matter because Louis is getting stronger.”

“Oh.”

“Oh? Is that all you have to say?” Liam asks and he looks angry and it's something new and it scares Niall.

He just wanted to chat with Liam, get to know him, he didn’t want to be looked at with that pityful look everyone gives him when they think he is too stupid to understand things.

“You know,” Liam tells him, “The other day, when you asked us to sit with you and your friend with the long hair, just for a moment I thought you were thankful for Louis’ help, that you wanted to show him some love. When in fact, you were just trying to get to know me. I am not blind, Niall, I know you like me.”

“I…” Niall is speechless, which is something that doesn’t happen that often. His heart beats faster in his chest, mostly because for the first time in his life he feels absolutely embarrassed. He can already picture where this is going and he knows he is not going to like it. And it’s all Louis’ fault because he is the reason why he met Liam in the first place. Maybe it was Louis who told Liam Niall had a crush on him. Can it actually be considered a crush? He has known Liam for such a short amount time… he is just intrigued, or is he really? He hates Liam right now and he still doesn’t know how to reply and not sound like a complete fool. “It’s not…”

“But I don't like you,” Liam replies faster, “And I don't mean it physically. You are kinda attractive. I just don't like you as a person and if I stick around it’s just for Louis, you'd better get that in your head and stop trying to talk to me.”

Niall listened to all of this without making a sound, his blood running cold in his veins, he knew it was going to happen, he feels so embarrassed he thinks he might throw up. Niall thinks he could at least explain that Louis is not the victim here and that probably half of what he said about Niall to make Liam hate him so much isn't even true, but his mouth has gone dry and his tongue doesn't move and he knows he'll start crying if he Liam doesn't stop talking.

“She’ll be here in twenty minutes,” Louis cheers, coming back in the room, talking to Liam as if Niall didn’t even existed, “You can wait, right?”

“Sure.”

“Where are you going, Niall?” Louis asks as he spots his brother slowly trying to stand up.

“I want to go to my room,” he chokes out and lucky for him Louis blames his knee for Niall’s pained tone.

Louis sighs pointing out that it's their room and not Niall's, but he helps him anyway, the same way they are now familiar with, while Liam drops himself on the couch and waits for his friend to come back.

They are almost at the top of the staircase when Niall's hand slips from the handle he is gripping, almost sending him down the stairs as Louis crumpled under his weight.

It happens so fast that Niall barely has time to register it happening before he feels a familiar sharp pain in his knee and although his mouth was shut a scream is ripped out of his throat. He knows he's going to fall face first when two strong arms grab his midsection and he is being lifted off his brother and sat on a step. He is shaking, either from the shock or from the pain, he isn't sure.

“I'm gonna throw up,” he tries to warn the other two, but maybe no one hears him because he finds himself dry-heaving, thank God he hasn't eaten a lot today, so it's just a little bit of bile coming up, but no one is rubbing his back or holding his forehead. When he feels a tiny bit better and can finally process what just happened, he finds Liam crouching in front of Louis who looks as pale as snow, tears rolling down his cheeks.

Niall's first thought is that he hit his head falling, but then he notices Louis’ arms wrapped tight around his stomach and Niall really wants to know what's wrong with him, but he is in too much pain and he feels slightly dizzy, the smell of his own vomit making him even more nauseous.

“What?” Liam asks sharply turning to him and Niall realizes he had been moaning.

“Help me up, please.”

“Lou, can you stay here for a moment?” Liam asks and when Louis nods he helps  Niall up, basically carrying him to his room.

Every hop makes Niall want to throw up again, he had to put weight on his leg to stop himself from falling and now he realizes why the doctor forbid him to. His knee hurts in a way it never did before.

Despite the circumstances he likes this closeness to Liam, the scent of his skin, the way his strong body feels against Niall's own. He doesn’t really likes the way Liam carelessly drops him on the bed and goes away, not bothering to even ask if he is okay. He is not, by the way. He sighs to himself, throwing his dirty shirt on the floor, angrily unwrapping the brace from his leg. His fingers barely touching his knee but it's enough to make him cry out.

He sits there for a while, trying to get used to the pain and stop himself from shaking, deciding at some point that he is too cold and even if he can't have a shower right now he can at least wear a clean shirt. Even if it means he has to get up to take it.

Slowly he makes his way to the wardrobe and pulls out a hoodie.

The house is silent and his door open which means he can clearly hear the voices out there, as he stands with his hand on the wall trying to find support leaning against it.

“I did that, didn't I?” Liam asks and Niall almost wants to peek outside, but he just can’t move.

Louis inhales sharply, “It's alright. It was an accident.”

There is something that doesn't sound right to Niall, he just can't put his finger on it. His knee is hurting even more, he knows he has to sit down sooner rather than later, but he is glued to his spot, eavesdropping on some private conversations he is sure Louis doesn’t want him to listen to.

“Your side is purple, Louis. I actually think you have a couple of cracked ribs here.”

“It's fine. You didn't mean it.”

And what the fuck is this supposed to mean? Niall wonders, trying to get back to his bed, only to lose his balance and fall again. This time there is no one cushioning his fall and he actually hits the floor pretty hard, his left wrist -his already sore one- stopping his fall, his leg twisting painfully under his weight.

“Niall!” Louis yells and Niall can hear him scrambling to get in the room.

All Niall can feel is blinding pain, until Louis’ hands carefully move him, guiding him into a sitting position.

“Eh, it's okay, Niall please calm down,” Louis begs, rubbing a hand down Niall's arm and if Niall hadn't been in so much pain he'd thought he was only doing it because he is afraid their mom would blame it on Louis.

Instead he is in pain and he is glad his brother is here. “Hurts,” he gasps between sobs, “Hurts so bad.”

“What hurts?”

It takes a while for Niall to get a coherent sentence out and tell Louis that his knee is twisted and he can't stand the pain anymore.

Louis stares at him, blinking a couple of times, he always does that when he is stressed. “Should I call mom? Do you want to-”

He doesn't end the sentence, because Liam suddenly sits on the other side of Louis, at Niall's knee height, feeling it with his hand and earning a yelp from him.

“Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever had it put back in place?”

“Just once, please don't touch it,” Niall rushes to answer, wrapping his shaky fingers around Liam's bicep. He is even more scared now. Liam doesn’t like him and he might hurt him pretty bad. Niall just wants his mom.

“It's the easiest way to make the pain stop. Louis, could you bring him some ice, he'll need it.”

“Louis I don't think it's a good idea.” Niall whispers, but obviously his brother doesn't pay attention to him and scrambles away to do what Liam told him to.

Great. Now his life is in this idiot’s hands, in the hands of the one who is probably abusing his brother. Okay, maybe not his life, but his leg surely is and it's not that comforting.

“I need to take your pants off.”

“What?”

“Don't act like a prude now, I am not that delighted to see you naked,” Liam says and Niall hates his tone, “Come on, if your knee swells too much I won't be able to put it back in place.”

Niall can't move, he is so fucking scared. He just lets Liam do everything, barely following his instructions. “Can we at least wait for Louis? What is taking him so long?”

“Don't be that scared, Niall,” Liam tells him and it's way more gentle this time, “It's okay. I have done it to my sister a couple of times, she is a dancer, it happens often to her, I promise.”

“Please…”

“It's okay. You can pinch my arm if you want to, some sort of revenge if I hurt you. Sounds fair?”

It doesn't but Niall can't really tell him that. He nods, only wanting for it to end. “Just don't hurt me.”

“Can’t promise that. Now, I need you to relax.”

Niall almost chokes on his saliva, “It sounds like porn.”

“I wouldn't do any porn related thing with you even if you were the last person on Earth. Now, relax your leg or it will hurt ten times worse.”

“I can't relax it! It hurts and you being a bitch is not helping! What are you ? Bipolar? One moment you are all ni-”

“Niall, stop yelling,” Louis warns, getting back in the room, dropping his phone on a shelf, “It was mom. She's gonna be late. I didn't tell her, do you want me to?”

Niall wants to tell him that he is an idiot and he should have told mom, but then there is a sharp pain in his whole leg, his toes twitching in distress when his lower leg is pushed straight and his kneecap snaps back in place. “Shit.”

“Told you, you just needed to relax,” Liam smiles, grabbing the ice from Louis’ hands and holding it on Niall's leg. “Do you feel sick? Head spinning?”

“Dunno.”

“Liam, he is shaking.”

“It's okay, just shock. Lay him down, he'll feel better in a moment,” Liam instructs, “I think he'd feel more comfortable with some pants on.”

Niall hears everything and he wishes he'd be able to tell them that seriously, pants are his last worry at the moment and that he doesn’t want to be moved. But he can't really talk, still trying to catch his breath, so he lets Louis lower him down pushing on his shoulders, and stares at the ceiling for a while, blinking rapidly until he processes that the pain his knee is fading. Yeah, it feels better now.

“Better?” Louis asks, rubbing his arm lightly.

When Niall nods Liam suddenly stands up, “I have to go now.”

“Liam, we had plans.”

“We can reschedule. I have to go, and you should keep an eye on him, especially if you are planning on not telling your mom about this. It was just a slight dislocation, but maybe he had some damage done, I don’t really know. See you.”

Niall sighs, is that supposed to comfort him? It doesn't. But he is happy Louis is going to stay with him today. Maybe, just maybe he needs his brother.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhm. .. hi!!!
> 
> So, how are you?I have been pretty busy this week, but it's been amazing! And yeah, I usually don't ramble about private life here, but I have been spending a week in the section of the hospital where I hope to work one day, standing side to side to the doctors there and they were all patient and gentle and gave me the opportunity to learn a lot and I am very very happy.
> 
> That said, what do you think happened between Liam and Louis? The whole "Liam accidentally hurting Louis"?
> 
> And what about the things Liam said to Louis?
> 
> Libs_


	4. Louis' secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall wants to know what's wrong with his brother and his plan involves Harry, of course!

“Louis, sweetheart, how are you?” Jay asks, ruffling her son’s hair, “Did Niall cause you any problems?”

“He’s been fine,” Louis replies, not comfortable with lying to his mom about something not related to himself. She asked if he was okay, he said yes with no hesitation, but he doesn't like talking for Niall. But he can't say he let his brother fall and hurt himself either, but it's fine, he is young and he is allowed to do something stupid once in a while. If Niall wants he can be the one telling her what happened. And maybe explain that Louis was hurt too, that's why Niall was alone.

“Good, would you mind calling him and get ready for dinner?”

Louis shrugs, standing up with a noise of disappointment and slowly makes his way upstairs. It has always been like this, always ‘Louis do this and do that’ just because if someone had asked for Niall to do something he'd just ignored them, so mom stopped asking and everything had just been on Louis. Always. He shouldn't mind, especially not now given his brother’s situation, but he is still a bit bitter about the whole “doing things” thing. Because he is pretty sure that if Niall had two functioning legs it wouldn't have been different.

“Mom said to get ready for dinner,” he states once he reaches his room, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the doorframe.

“Can I eat here?” Niall asks, giving him a pleading look, “I really don't want to move.”

“Is it still that bad?”

“I don't know, I just don't want to test it right now.”

With a small nod Louis goes back downstairs, simply telling his mom that Niall doesn’t want to come down. He gets his brother’s plate full and ready to be brought  to him before his mom asks for him to do that. “Actually, I think I might eat upstairs as well,” he decides suddenly.

“Good choice,” his mom prizes him, “It was about time you two started to get along again.”

“It's not that,” Louis mumbles and he doesn't know why he feels the need to clarify that he isn't doing it for Niall. He just doesn't want to have dinner with his dad, he feels stupid trying to avoid him in every possible way, but it's exactly what he is doing. Niall is a better company than Bob anyway.

So he balances the two plates in his hands, a bottle of water under his arm and some napkins into his pocket and heads upstairs.

“Here,” Louis says, placing Niall's plate next to him and sitting on his own bed.

He isn't hungry. His stomach has been hurting a lot lately and Liam force feeding him isn't helping. Mom made some chicken with peppers and she really could have made a better choice. It's evening and Louis is pretty sure he'd throw up everything if he even tries to take a bite. Peppers always make him feel sick. So he sticks to some bread, nibbling it with his fingers and showing it in his mouth.

“Lou, can I have some more, please?” Niall asks nicely. He actually called him Lou, not idiot and Louis is almost fazed.

“Here, take mine,” he replies, standing up to give him the plate.

“Are you sure? You didn't even try it!”

“I'm not going downstairs to get you more, it's this or nothing.”

“I don't want to eat your food,” Niall replies, pushing the plate away and shrugging.

Louis sighs, “It's not poisoned, don't worry,” he plays it off, but Niall just glares at him, so he tries again, “I don't like it, now shut up and eat it.”

This time Niall accepts the plate, stabbing a piece of meat with his fork,  “Louis, I have a question.”

“Shoot.”

“Can you come here? I'd like to look at you without twisting my neck,” he says, sitting better and using his right arm to slowly lift his body, getting closer to the wall, to make room for Louis as he sits on the edge.

“Are you okay?” Niall asks, chewing on his nails.

Is Niall okay, actually? Where did it come from? “Did you hit your head? We,” Louis says, pointing between himself and his brother, “Don't have this kind of conversation. Remember? Go ask Harry if he is okay.”

Niall puts the still untouched plate away, leaning closer to Louis, “I am serious. Please, I know I have not been a great brother, but I don't want you to suffer in silence.”

“I am not suffering, thanks for caring.”

“I know Liam is abusing you.”

Okay, this is going too far. Liam is abusing him? All his life Louis has had just one kind of abuse and it came from his family, surely not from his friend. A punch in the ribs is not abuse, it's an accident and Niall is an idiot.

\---

The next morning, Niall wakes up with a mission : saving his brother from that shit head of an abuser. He might be mean to Louis sometimes, but he loves his brother and he won't stand still when someone is hurting him, especially if it's someone who rejected Niall himself. He hates Liam like he has never hated anyone.

“You have to help me,” he tells Harry while they wait for their math teacher to arrive.

Harry gives him a curious look, glancing up from his phone, “With what?”

“I need to see where my brother and Liam go everyday.”

“Good. How are you planning on that? And why do you think I want to be involved?”

“You'll be involved because you are my best mate-”

“Am not.”

“Are too. You are my best mate and because you need to make it up to me.”

“Make it up for what?”

“I am sure you did something wrong to me, so that's your chance to apologise.”

“You are crazy.”

“And you are still helping.”

And that's how Niall and Harry end up following Louis and Liam when they get out that afternoon. It took a while for Niall to persuade his mom, but she finallly let him go out without his brother, with the promise of Harry staying close and not walking, just staying in the car.

So Harry follows Louis’ car doing his best not to look suspicious, he even leaves the car outside when he realizes they are going in the school.

“They probably had some journal meeting or something,” Harry mumbles, helping Niall get out of the car and handing him his crutches.

“I don't think so. What's the point of being so mysterious if that's what they are doing?” Niall says and it makes a lot a sense.

Niall is impossibly slow and it's a miracle that Liam and Louis don't hear the clicking of the crutches, but they seem so focus on their conversation that Niall figures he shouldn't be so surprised that they are not caring about the rest of the world.

“I told you!” Niall cheers when Liam guides Louis through the gym, “Louis wouldn't go in there willingly. We have PE together and he never plays. Like, ever! He always finds a good reason not to be playing and it's the only subject he is failing. Liam is forcing him! That evil-”

“Shut up, you idiot,” Harry replies,  grabbing his arm and forcing him to speed his pace, “Louis doesn't look so disappointed to me.” It looks like at this point Harry is curious too and Niall is glad he doesn't have to pry anymore to have a bit of help. Harry is fit, he can handle Liam if he tries to hurt Louis, because as much as Niall wants to punch him in the face, he knows he doesn't stand a chance against Liam right now.

They reach the closed door a few minutes after Liam and Louis entered the gym.

“What do we do now?” Harry asks.

“What do you mean?”

“If we go in they'll see us.”

That's right, Niall hadn't thought about it. He chews on his lip, curling his fingers around the handle of his crutch, “We get in and say you needed something for footie.”

“And why would they believe us?” Harry asks,rising his brow. Footie stuff is on the other side of the school, obviously next to the field so it really makes no sense and they need a better plan, quickly.

Niall is putting all his effort into this, but Harry simply pushes the door open, shamelessy revealing their presence before Niall has a chance to stop him.

Louis and Liam are alone in the middle of the room, wearing gym clothes that Niall didn't even know his brother owned. And Liam looks amazing, standing there shirtless and with his shorts hanging loosely on his hips. It takes a while for Niall to realize that now Liam and Louis are staring at them and he has no idea what to say or do.

“What are you doing here?” Louis asks, crossing his arms over his chest, or better yet, hugging himself with his arms as if he is embarassed of being caught.

“What are you doing?” Harry replies, giving Louis a look that neither Niall nor Louis can understand.

Louis bits his lip, akwardly playing with the white tape around his hands, “I asked first,” he states, doing his best to sound confident.

Niall looks all around, trying not to stare at Liam, even if it's almost impossible. “I am worried about you,” Niall finally admits, staring at his brother’s shoes.

“You are boxing?” Harry asks at some point, “I mean, the tape around your hands. You are boxing, right?”

“So he is not abusing you?” Niall asks and that's when Louis loses it.

Before anyone can do anything, he grabs his hoodie and his bag and leaves. Niall has no clue where he is going since home is not exactly close and he can't seriously be thinking of walking back. And why does he have to always be so melodramatic? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you really think Liam was an abuser? Remember when I told you "It's not what it looks like"? That's what I meant.
> 
> Poor Niall, he just wanted to be a good brother.
> 
> Sorry if the chapter seems a bit "dumb", this happens when I try not to be too melodramatic.
> 
> Now, why do you think Louis ran away? What will Niall do are this point? And especially, why is Liam teaching boxe?


	5. Confront

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis and Niall finally have a talk...

Louis just kept running for a while, his stomach twisting at the thought of Harry seeing him like this. After a while he stuck to walking slowly, already being too tired to run all the way home. And it took ages to get back, but once he entered the house, he just went upstairs, refusing to go and talk to anyone.

He has been up there the whole time, Niall only joining him after dinner.

“Why did you run away?” Niall asks, when they finally heard their parents’ door being shut, so they couldn’t hear what the boys were talking about.

Louis knew it was bound to happen. He can easily tell the truth, it’s not like Niall doesn’t know everything already,so what’s the point in lying? Oh, yeah, saving the last bits of his dignity. “I don’t like the idea of Harry seeing me in gym clothes. I’m not the gym type,” he spits out.

“Louis, there is no gym type, it’s all in your head,” Niall replies, rolling his eyes and Louis isn’t sure if he is serious or making fun of him. It looks a lot like the speech Liam gave him once, about being a bit more self confident and how low self exteem influences your private life. The only difference is that Liam is a friend, while Niall is just his dumb brother and his words mean nothing to Louis.

“Why were you spying on me, anyway?” Louis asks, trying to drop the subject and focus on Niall instead of himself.

This time Niall is the one who seems afraid to talk. “Please, don’t be mad, Louis,” he warns, before explaining, “I overheard you and Liam talking and he said he hurt you, that you had bruised ribs and you kept reassuring him that it had been an accident and I was worried.”

A small laugh escapes Louis’ lips as he begins explaining, “Boxing. He is teaching me how to boxe, Niall and that’s because I’m tired of feeling so girly.” Liam says that boxing helps him manage anger, he is a professional boxer, he even won some competitions. He can’t compete right now, but he enjoys helping Louis out and Louis actually finds it fun, but he won't tell his brother all of this. “He accidentally punched me, and I can’t even take a punch, I bruise easily. And as much as I think it’s nice of you to worry, you didn’t have to follow me. You didn’t have to take Harry with you, especially!”

“I know, but I don’t like Liam, I had to be sure you were okay.”

“Yeah, you had to think I was being abused to remember you have a brother, how nice of you.”

Niall looks at him wide eyed, “That’s not true, Louis. I care about you but you don’t want to talk to me anymore. I thought it was a phase at first, that you were just disappointed for not being on the team, and I thought if I gave you space, you’d cool down. But then you shut me out of your world and-”

“I shout you out?” Louis yells, then he remembers that his parents are probably trying to sleep and lowers his voice again, “I was just disappointed at first, Niall, because I was always your shoulder to cry on, whatever we did, it was Niall and his helper, never the other way around. And not making it on the team made me realise I had been wasting my time doing things that only pleased you.”

“I thought we had fun.”

And that’s probably true. Louis loved spending time with his brother, whatever they did was because they both enjoyed it. He isn’t being fair, but all this time alone made him bitter, “I didn’t, I was doing it just to please you,” he snaps, almost enjoying the hurt in Niall’s eyes, “Then you got on the team and suddenly you were the only son in this family.”

“I was what? Louis, mom made me read the whole school paper the first time you wrote on it!”

“Yeah, how many times after that, Niall? Probably just the first one, because she didn’t want to make me feel bad. But then dad came in and it was all about what Niall does and how good he is.”

“So it’s about dad?”

“Yes, Niall. It’s about dad and about the fact that I don’t matter anymore. I am good for mom because I am the only one who helps cleaning everything, because I can babysit you and I can make dinner. But if she doesn’t need me for something, it’s like I am not even at home. Dad always talks to you or about you and I don’t know which is worse !”

As soon as Louis closes his mouth, he realises that Niall isn’t yelling at him, he isn’t even growling in anger. He is crying. He thought that real men didn’t cry, even when they were on their death bed. That’s what their dad says and that’s why he hates Louis so much, because Louis is the one who always cries, while Niall is the perfectly tough son.

“What now?” Louis asks in disbelief, crossing his arms over his chest and staring at his twin with the same hateful stare he had before.

“Dad doesn’t talk to me anymore, so don’t worry. Last thing he told me is that it’s my fucking fault I got hurt and that I’m too stupid to go to Uni with my grades, so I’d better try and find a job if I can’t finish the season,” Niall chokes out, furiously rubbing at his red eyes.

“What?”

“Fuck you, Louis! You can be happy now!” Niall says and with that he lies back down on the bed and closes his eyes, despite Louis’ look still burning on his skin. “Well, why don’t you go have a party with your friend now?”

“I am so sorry. I didn’t know.”

“Yeah, you could have actually spoken to me instead of hating me for no reason, you know? I don’t even care anymore.”

Louis bits his lip, getting closer to his brother and rubbing his arm gently, trying to talk to him, “You are not dumb, Niall. I am sure you can finish the season, but if you can’t, you are not that bad. Don’t listen to him.”

“Am I supposed to believe the guy who would have walked over my dead body two seconds ago?”

Louis pouts at that, well aware that he kind of deserved it. “Well, you can always believe your twin, right? This goes past how much we fight, I guess.”

“I don’t think so. But thanks for telling me why you hated me so much, I guess it explains why Liam basically hates me without even knowing me and why you don’t want me in your life. It’s fine.”

Louis playfully shoves Niall’s arm, faking a hurt expression as he says, “Hey! I’m the dramatic one. You are the fun, careless twin who bothers me, not the other way around.”

“You always bother me,” Niall mumbles, but his face relaxes a bit and now Louis knows that they are okay. Well, not okay, but surely they are not hating each other anymore. They still need to talk about what’s going on with their lives, but they can have that talk tomorrow.

So Louis quietly stands up from Niall’s bed and heads to his own, ready to fall aleep.

“Lou, can I ask you a question?” Niall asks after a moment. He doesn’t wait for a reply, asking it anyway. “You know tomorrow, I have to go to the doctor and, you know...”

“I don’t know, Niall,” Louis replies, rolling his eyes as he curls on his side and turns the bedside lamp on to look at him.

Niall fidgets a bit, scratching his arm in distress and he’ll have a nasty rash if he doesn’t stop, but Louis doesn’t tell him to stay quiet, he just waits for him to keep talking. “The doctor will tell me if I need surgery and what’s the extent of the damage. So, mom and I are going and I don’t really want to go alone with her, you know how she gets.”

Actually Louis doesn’t, not from a direct experience. He is the responsible son, so she never really worries about him, that’s one of the many reasons why he is so jealous of Niall, because he always gets all the attention. Liam tried to explain that sure enough Niall is jealous of him too, because Louis is the one their parents always trust, while Niall is always treated as a baby. But Louis can’t stop thinking that he’d love to be babied from time to time.

“She is paranoid,” Niall keeps explaining, “She makes me feel anxious, and Harry can’t skip school.”

Silence. Now, Louis would be happy to hear his brother admitting out loud that he needs him, but Niall has already done a lot, telling Louis about his fear, explaining that he clearly wants company. “Do you want me to come?” Louis gives in, offering his help.

“I don’t know. Do you want to come?”

“Sure. I mean, I can skip school, I have to tell Liam, but it’s okay.”

“Why do you have to tell Liam?”

Louis shrugs, “Wouldn’t you tell Harry if you’d skip? Liam is my friend, he’d worrie if I didn’t show up at school without an explanation.”

“I think Harry wouldn’t notice,” Niall admitts, still scratching his skin, “We aren’t even that close.”

“Stop doing that thing to your arm, Niall ! You are hurting yourself,” Louis snaps and Niall instatnly freezes, pushing his arms under the sheets, trying to stay still and not bother the same spot again.

He always does that when he is anxious, Louis is pretty sure a couple of times he made himself bleed, their mom fussed about it for ages. And Louis is not so sure it’s healthy. Maybe he should talk about this to Liam, he has always been helpful with this kind of problems, he helps Louis so much and maybe he can help Niall too.

So Louis does his best to do what Liam does when Louis is the one who is feeling a bit under the weather. He is always gentle, nice and caring with him.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to snap like that,” Louis apologises, “Just don’t hurt yourself, okay? Your skin is sensitive.”

“You sound like mom,” Niall jokes.

Yeah, Louis always does the same too, he gets defensive because he knows deep down that he has been caught doing something he definitely shouldn’t do. So he tries to get Niall to talk, the way Liam does with him. “You seem pretty close to Harry.”

They are inseparable and Louis really doesn't get what is brother is talking about, he basically ditched Louis for Harry and now he claims they aren't close?

“We hang out together, we are not friends. We are good as long as we have fun, but we don’t have deep talks or whatever.”

“There are different ways to be friends,” Louis tries to explain, “You are not the type who does deep talks either.”

For being his first time helping someone else, Louis can say he is doing a pretty good job. Maybe it’s not that difficult to help someone who is struggling. It’s probably because Louis knows Niall and he can easily get his sore spots, or maybe Liam makes it look like a big deal just because his therapist says so. But Liam is the one who is in therapy, Louis and Niall are just normal teenagers, they are not that difficult. Louis can manage this one on his own.

“Liam stood up for you, he told me I am a shitty brother and that he stands my presence just for your sake. Harry doesn’t care if something happens to me, he won’t come with me tomorrow because his first period is PE and he doesn’t want to miss it.”

Shit. Louis probably spoke too soon, because what is he supposed to answer at this point ? He likes Harry, he really does, but Louis didn’t think twice about missing school to go with Niall and Harry is supposed to be his best friend. Liam would have come in a heartbeat because that's what friends do.

“So you are jealous of my friendship with Liam?” Louis finds himself asking. It was supposed to be a way to drop the whole Harry subject and Louis didn’t mean it to sound that accusing.

“I’m not jealous. I hate Liam, I don’t know how you can stand him, he is an ass.”

“He is a good friend, Niall, you just happen to be on his death list and that’s probably my fault too.”

Niall rises his brow, suspiciously eyeing his brother, asking “Too?”

And Louis shrugs at him, standing up from his bed and going back to Niall’s.

Louis is not the kind of person who loves phisical contact but he missed his brother. Besides, Niall might enjoy cuddles, he seems too down right now.

He looks almost the way Louis did when he met Liam and if Louis is sure of one thing, it’s that he wasn’t in a good place at that time. Niall is just good at hiding his struggles and Louis knows that, because he himself hid it for a long time.

Surprisingly enough, Niall makes room for him, scooting closer to the wall and half sitting up when Louis hugs him.

“Your stomach is rumbling, Louis,” Niall mumbles, breaking out their hug, “Did you eat?”

“Yeah.”

  
“Louis…”

“Niall. I ate. Now let’s sleep.”

Louis quickly stands up again and this time when he lies in his bed, Niall doesn’t bother him and soon enough they both fall asleep.

_

  
The next morning Louis wakes up with his stomach still rumbling quite loudly and his first thought is that he has to skip breakfast without Niall noticing. Most mornings he just lies, telling he’ll eat at school, which is half true sometimes, since Liam always brings coffee and a croissant and they split it, since neither of them wants to eat it all. But today he is stuck with Niall all morning.

What can he do?

It’s not that he doesn’t want to eat. It’s just that Harry saw him in gym clothes, he probably saw all the flaws in Louis’ body and that thought is enough to make him feel nauseus, he really can’t have breakfast. Not when Niall is eating with him and Louis can compare how different their metabolisms are. Niall probably eats three times what Louis eats, bul he still is perfectly fit. Even now that he can hardly move, he is in perfect shape, while Louis is doing some boxing and he is still all fluffy and soft.

He stands up and slowly goes downstairs, while Niall is still asleep, only to be met with his dad sitting at the table, sipping coffee and his mom making pancakes.

“Mom, I’m not going to school today,” he says, not bothering to say goodmorning and definitely not bothering to aknowledge his dad’s presence.

Jay turns in his direction frowning, “How come?” she asks, slightly bending her head to the right. She looks genuinely curious and Louis is happy for that bit of interest from her, but when he glances at his dad he finds him in the same position, with his head buried in a newspaper. What Louis does, doesn't concern him, obviously.

“I’m coming with you and Niall,” Louis explains.

Now at the same time he hears two different replies.

On one hand his mom cheers, “Good. I’ll buy you both ice cream later, your brother might use some company.” On the other hand, his dad grumbles, “Your brother doesn’t need other people babying him and you can’t miss school.”

“But-”

“End of discussion.”

That’s the longest they have talked to each other in ages and Louis thought he’d be more afraid to face his dad. Instead he is just angry, because yesterday his brother was crying and now their dad has the guts to tell Louis that he is babying him ?

If it had happened yesterday, Louis would have been angry because both of his parents only thought about Niall. Niall might need company. Niall doesn't need to be babied. Great.

But it doesn't matter because his brother needs him. And his dad is being an asshole.

Luckly before Louis can open his mouth and say something he’ll regret later, his mom steps in, asking for him to go wake Niall, so she can talk to her husband.

Maybe she can make him see reason.

So Louis nods, heading upstairs. His stomach hurts, it’s like a burning sensation in his chest and he has to stop on the stairs for a moment, trying to decide if he needs to throw up, lie down or something else. He takes a deep breath, making his way up to Niall and slowly waking him up, ignoring the pain.

Niall is always grumpy in the morning, a bit more now that he can’t sleep well because he has to lay on his back, but once he is awake enough, he looks at Louis a bit worried. “Are you okay? You look… off.”

“I’m fine.” He doesn’t mention their parents’ arguing, Niall will feel responsible for that and guiltyness isn’t a good feeling. He doesn’t mention that he doesn’t feel good, because if he does Niall will worry and allegedly tell their mom. Louis couldn’t stand it if she'd say that Niall is more important, while he only has a stomach ache, so he can't tell her.

Liam says he has to eat when his stomach hurts like that. He says that it’s just hunger, and probably he is right, because he feels better when something is sitting in his stomach, but Louis is pretty sure this kind of pain has nothing to do with hunger. He just can’t put his finger on it.

“Why don’t you go shower and then we can go downstairs ?” Louis asks, already making his bed.

He’ll wait for Niall to close himself in the bathroom and he’ll lay on his bed just for a moment or two, hoping it will be enough to make him feel better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!
> 
> Feel free to hate me whenever you want, I won't blame you. I know I left you with more questions than answers so...
> 
> What do you think about the twins' dad?
> 
> And what about Louis' stomach? What do you think is wrong with it?
> 
> And Liam? What's your opinion about him?
> 
> Anyway, I'll be a bit slower for the next update because I have an exam in less than two weeks. I'll do my best to update before it, but it's pretty hard and long, so wish me good luck!


	6. Sick

Louis is a little bit shaken up when they get back home that morning.

Niall had a fucking panic attack when the doctor told him about the surgery; when he mentioned the fact that he'll be awake, even if slightly doped up, he literally froze on the spot, not being able to breathe and fainted after a couple of stressful minutes, scaring to death both Louis and their mom. The doctor smiled simphatetically at them, saying it's normal, he is just overwhelmed.

Even now, the next morning, when Niall is playing the cool guy and pretending yesterday never happened, Louis can tell he isn't fine.

Louis would tell him something, but he couldn't sleep all night because of his stomach aching too bad and he feels awful today. He has to spend all day at school, between classes and newspaper club and then he and Liam will have their boxe lesson. Niall went to school just because he had to tell his teachers he'll be home for a while because of the surgery, which is scheduled in three days time, but he'll have to wait until Louis is free to take him home and he has already complained about it.

Louis would gladly tell him to ask Harry to take him home and shut the fuck up, but then he remembers the conversation they had the other night and decides to let him be grumpy all day, he still has to do what Louis says so it's okay.

"Louis, I feel like my head is splitting in two and mom isn't answering her fucking phone," Niall whines for the hundredth time, "And my leg hurts. And I want to go home."

"I have other things to do. So please, be nice and go wait somewhere" Louis replies, speeding his pace and leaving Niall a few steps behind. 

He can hear Niall complaining, but seriously he has more important things on his mind right now. Like, why is his stomach still hurting ? He almost wants to rub it a bit, but Liam is right next to him, so he forces his hands to stay still and does his best to ignore the pain.

"Lou, you sure? It's not even an important meeting today. You could go home," Liam mumbles leaning against him, so Niall can't hear him.

"I am sure. He can't always have what he wants."

"He seems quite sick to me."

"He is a great actor, don't let him fool you, Liam." 

That's how Louis leaves his brother in the library and goes to his meeting.

\---

Niall has been in the library for at least an hour when Liam comes to get him.

"Where's Louis?" is Niall's first question. He knows it's still early for them to be finished and he doesn't like that Liam came to talk to him. Louis could have come. And yes, he knows his brother has been acting weird all day and Niall doesn't know if he should be worried or angry at him.

"He doesn't feel good, we are going home early."

Great, so if it's Louis not feeling good they can go home, but when Niall asked them, he had to suck it up and wait all day. Of course. He doesn't reply to Liam, trying to be happy just about the fact that he can go home and lie down soon. So he quickly grabs all his things from the desk and puts them in his bag, akwardly managing to stand up and crutch his way over to Liam. If anything, he is getting better with crutches. He'll need then for a while, so it's a good thing, sadly.

He walks a couple of steps behind Liam, just in case he gets annoyed and decides to snap at him again. He just wants to go home and fall asleep and maybe wake up once his surgery is done and he can properly walk again.

At some point he feels his left hand tense up, the crutch slipping from his grasp and falling to the ground with a tickling sound. He barely as the time to catch himself with his right crutch. His whole arm hurts, it's like it has its own mind as it keeps spasming, his fingers stuck in a akward position and it hurts. 

No one else is in the hallway, so Liam can easily hear that he has stopped and turns around just to find Niall with a pained expression on his face, trying to figure out what's wrong with his hand. 

"Hey, we have to go," Liam tells him, but then he seems to realise that something is wrong.

"Ah, not fun man," Liam sighs, grabbing Niall's hand into his own and Niall almost yells at him when he touches it. "Don't worry it's just cramps," Liam tells him, trying to bend Niall's fingers downwords.

"It hurts, stop !" 

Liam shakes his head, grabbing Niall's wrist with one hand and clutching the other around his bicep.

"What are you- AH !" Niall gasps when Liam pushes his arm down, keeping his hand still, but when Liam releases his hold, his hand hurts a little less.

"Shake your hand."

"What?" Niall chokes out, his mouth suddenly completely dry.

Liam shows him the movement, repeating that he needs to shake the hand to get rid of it. "First time ?" he asks and Niall simply nods, he is not even sure of what just happened. "It's okay. It's probably because you always have your hands around the bar of the crutches. Try not to hold them too tightly, okay ? Or maybe use them less."

"How do you know all of this ?"

"I get cramps sometimes. I'll show you how to get rid of them, okay ?"

Niall shrugs, staring at the ground. "Everytime I stay with you for more than a few minutes I end up hurting myself," Niall complains, still moving his hurting hand, enjoying the feeling of being able to control his own limb. It's something he always considered for garanted and now he knows it's not.

"I always end up helping you, you were lucky I was here, it could have lasted for hours."

"Geez, thanks, man," Niall mumbles, rolling his eyes.

"Are you okay to walk ?" Liam asks, grabbing the crutch off the ground and handing it to Niall, "I left your brother alone and he really wasn't feeling good."

Oh, right. Louis. Niall nods and begins to walk again, trying to keep his grip on his left crutch as loose as possible, his hand still slightly bothering him.

Louis is sitting in the passenger seat of their car, so Niall climbs in the back, finding it hard to fit in. "You okay?" he asks and Louis nods, despite his lips being almost white and his face just as pale.

"Is there someone at yours, Lou?" Liam asks and this time there is a small shake of Louis' head.

"Everyone is at work," Niall explains, once he realises that Liam is not looking at Louis.

So they head home.

Niall stays behind them whole time, watching Liam help his brother out of the car and into the house, almost shutting the door in Niall's face. Should he feel even worse now ? Basically everyone rejects him and he is nothing more than a third wheel.

He'd cry about it, but when he gets inside, he can clearly hear Liam and Louis arguing from the bathroom. And it's about something Niall really didn't want to hear.

He sits on the couch in a daze, not really sure of what to think.

"Are you okay ?" Liam asks at some point, shaking his hand in front of Niall's face to catch his attention. 

"He threw up. He fucking threw up." Niall says with no emotion in his voice. That's what Liam said after all. That his brother shoved his fingers down his throat and made himself throw up. It's sort of... disgusting. 

"You need to calm down, Niall."

"How can I ? Fuck. I knew it. I knew something was wrong and-"

"Niall !" Liam snaps, trying to stop him, but it's useless.

Niall's brain is still trying to process it all. "We need to tell someone. I need to tell mom."

"You can't." Liam says in a resigned tone and Niall finally looks at him.

"What ?"

"I felt betrayed by my friend, the one who told my teacher about what I was doing."

"I don't know what you are talking about."

Liam's cheeks turn bright red, and he looks down. And fuck, it's the first time that Liam blushes like that, the first time that he doesn't just treat Niall like crap. It'd be kind of cute if the circumstances where different.

"It doesn't matter, Niall. The point is, It took me ages to forgive him and Louis won't forgive you that easily."

"I don't care. This is too much for us to handle. I just discovered that my brother is makes himself throw up-"

"Actually it's more complicated than that. He starves himself and when he eats he throws it up. It's, it's not good."

"Oh well, now I am relieved !" Niall says ironically. He wants to cry.

"It's not about him hating you, for what I care about you, he'd better hate you anyway." Liam says and Niall doesn't understand why he always feels the need to tell him how much he hates him. "But you are his brother and you are one of the few people who can help. Don't betray him."

"What then ?"

"Trust me, okay ? I know what I am talking about and I know how to help. Just- do not tell anyone and especially do not tell him you know."

Niall cringes at those words because there is nothing he wants more than confront his brother about this. He is scared as hell, but he feels like avoiding the talk is the dumbest thing to do. 

He is about to argue about it, when Louis decides to come back from the bathroom.

"What's wrong Ni ?" he asks with a frown.

"No- Nothing," Niall chokes out, his mind barely functioning.

"Oh, come on," Louis objects, sitting next to him as if nothing has happened, "You know I don't believe you one bit. What happened ?"

Niall thinks about it. Louis trusts Liam, is he supposed to do the same ? Actually he knows nothing about this boy and who says he is actually helping ? What if he is tricking Louis ? He can't risk that. Maybe he should-

"Fine. Louis, your brother kissed me, but I told him he is not really my type," Liam shrugs, crossing his arms over his chest and chewing on his lower lip, a bit embarassed.

Niall's mind needs a moment to process it. How can he lie like that ? Besides, he'd never kiss Liam out of all people !

"Fuck !" Louis sighs, "Niall, I thought you got the message the first time."

First time ? What is he talking about ? Did he know about the little talk Liam and Niall had had ? 

Now he is the one who feels like throwing up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am incredibly sorry for being soooo late. But exams have been impossibly hard and they just began, so I'll be slow for a little while... I apologise. 
> 
> Anyway, this was short, but I hope you still liked it.
> 
> So, what's your opinion on Liam? Now his character is getting a little bit more interesting, I guess...


	7. Brotherly issues

Niall can't sleep the whole night. He’s thinking so hard that at some point his head begins to throb. So, Louis is anorexic and he knows Niall has a crush on Liam. And Liam knows that too but he hates Niall and he is trying to help Louis because he is such a great person. Well, he is not and Niall honestly hates him right now. 

 

He didn't get out of his bed the whole evening yesterday. He went to bed right after Liam said what he said, crying like he was three again. At some point he heard his dad and his mum talking about the surgery. ‘He doesn't need you to go with him, he is old enough to handle it on his own,’ his dad had said and then he had added something about just ‘dropping him to the hospital’ and Niallhaf wanted to cry again but there were no more tears.

 

Now it's five in the morning and he still doesn't dare moving, even if his bladder is screaming at him to get up and relieve himself. He turns over in bed and faces Louis. His brother is awake too, but he probably hasn’t noticed Niall staring in the poor light coming from the window. Louis is clasping his hands over his belly, biting his lip to stop crying and not make too much noise.

 

“Louis?” Niall calls, almost making him jump, “Lou what's wrong?”

 

Louis doesn't answer and Niall wonders for a moment if he is asleep. He isn't. Niall can see the sparkle of his blue eyes even in the dark room.

 

“Are you sick again?” Niall asks. 

 

He hasn't seen his parents last night and that's the only reason why he hasn't told his mom yet. Louis starves himself. He is anorexic, or borderline, like Liam likes to say. It doesn't make a huge difference to Niall, honestly. Anyway, now that he thinks about it, maybe he really shouldn't tell anyone. What if it upsets his dad more? Maybe he should only tell his mom. Or maybe try and talk to Louis about it.

 

Niall closes his eyes, trying to think what to say. There isn't an easy way to put it. Carefully Niall stands up, leaning against the wall to hobble the few steps to Louis’ bed. He sits, or maybe falls, on the bed and turns the bedside lamp on. “Louis, are you hurting that much?” he asks.

 

Now that Louis can't hide himself he just nods. He’ll pretend to be sick, to have cought or a bug or something, Niall thinks. “What did you eat?” he asks taking advantage of the fact that Louis is sleepy and in pain. Maybe he'll say the wrong thing and out himself.

 

Of course Louis is not that dumb. He lies way better than Niall does. “I ate some cheeseburger with Liam. It probably didn't agree with me.”

 

“Or maybe you didn't eat at all,” Niall says harshy.

 

“I did, I-”

 

“Louis please. I am tired and my head hurts and my leg is throbbing. I can't listen to your bullshit right now. I- I think you have a problem.”

 

Louis jumps up, sitting in front of Niall, trying to look scary. “I think you should stop worrying and leave me alone, you idiot.”

 

“I'm your brother, of course I worry.”

 

“Well, you shouldn't. That wouldn't get you closer to Liam, okay? Liam hates you, he thinks you are a spoilt little bitch and nothing more. His words, not mine.”

 

Niall bits his lip. It hurts, it really hurts. Because he only wanted to be nice, to help, but Louis has closed himself in his shell again and he hates Niall and he doesn't want any help.

 

Niall feels frustrated and sad, but especially angry because no one says he is a ‘spoilt little bitch,’ he is far from it. “You know what?” he says, doing his best to not rise his voice too much,  “Fine. I'm gonna wake mum and tell her you aren't eating. That you are a fucking anorexic and your so called friend is covering for you. I'm sure she'll be happy to put you on a scale to check how underweight you are and then put you in a fucking clinic for fuck-”

 

Louis instantly brings his hand to Niall's mouth to shut him, but Niall smirks in a evil way and leans away, so Louis can't reach him. Instead of dropping his hand, Louis grabs Niall's arm and digs his nails into the flesh as deep as he can, making Niall gasp. 

 

“If you don't want me to tell mom, let me go,” Niall says, but Louis holds tighter. “If you don't want me to tell dad you cried over his words don't tell mom” Louis fired back.

 

They won't go anywhere. They know too well how to hurt each other. But right now, Niall doesn't want to hurt Louis. He is still angry about his words, but he guesses Louis is in a really bad place, he might at least try to be understanding.

 

“I won't tell mom, okay? We can work this out, but you need to let go of me and tell me what's going on.”

 

“I don't want to tell you anything.” Louis mumbles, but he lets go of Niall, revealing the deep half moons printed on his arm. 

 

Niall rubbs them with his other hand, “I'm pretty sure I can see some blood here,” he says, staring at one of the deepest marks, earning a “You deserved it,” from Louis.

 

They glare  at each other for a moment, then Louis’ belly cramps and he hugs himself tightly, trying to stop the awful noise it's making.

 

“Fuck,” Niall mumbles, “When was the last time you ate, Lou?”

 

Louis gives him another look, his forehead drenched in sweat. “I ate dinner yesterday. Liam forced me that's why it hurts so much.”

 

He is crying.

 

“Okay. Easy Lou, it's just fine,” Niall tries to reassure him, hating every single word just as he pronunces them. Louis is crying from how bad it hurts and Niall has no idea what it feels like and he can do nothing. Yet he talks like he knows what he is saying. No wonder Louis ignores him.

 

“Liam- Please call Liam.”

 

“Lou It's five in the morning, I'm not calling anyone. Come on, you'll be okay.” as they talk, Louis suddenly throws up all over himself. 

 

Niall really doesn’t want to inspect his vomit, but it looks like there are bites of undigested food and Louis probably wasn't lying when he said he had had dinner. Fighting back the urge to gag, Niall pulls at Louis’ shirt forcing him to rise his arms a bit and throws the shirt on the floor. He'll make it disappear later. 

 

For now he settles Louis in a comfortable position, and helps him fall back asleep, even if it's almost six now and he has to wake up in an hour or so.

 

Niall spends the rest of the night awake.

  
  


\---

  
  


Louis wakes up with a awful taste in his mouth. He usually brushes his teeth after throwing up, but he was so sick and shaken up yesterday that he forgot. He runs to the bathroom, spitting some acid in the sink and splashing tons of water on his face, drinking a bit, just to spit again. The taste doesn't go away.

 

When Louis gets out of the bathroom, Niall is staring at him. “What?” Louis asks, feeling weird under his eyes.

 

“You are not going to school today.”

 

“What? I can't just not go. There is the newspaper and Liam and I-”

 

Niall sighs, readjusting the crutch under one arm and curling and uncurling the fingers of his other hand. “You definitely aren’t spending your day with your bitchy friend who teaches you boxe while you can barely stand up straight. I already told mum.”

 

Louis is about to ask what exactly he said, when Niall shrugs all his worries off, mumbling, “I told her I don't want to be alone, that I need someone there. I guess she feels guilty because she has to work, so she decided it might be nice for you to stay here.”

 

Louis is somehow relieved for a moment. At least no one knows his secret. But then he gets angry again. As always, mom feels guilty about poor Niall staying home alone, who cares if Louis had something else to do? 

 

He walks past Niall, shutting the door of his room close ad throwing himself on the bed. He is tired, deep down he is glad he doesn't have to pretend to be okay in front of Liam today. 

 

Of course his peace doesn't last forever. As soon as their mom is gone, Niall begins to bug him until Louis goes downstairs with him and makes some breakfast.

 

“You are eating with me.” Niall states.

 

“Yeah, force me,” Louis grins. Niall is bigger, but he is weaker, he can't even get upstairs without help and for once Louis is the stronger one. “You saw what food does to me,” he adds, slightly ashamed.

 

Niall nods, cutting some toasts into triangles. “You don't have to eat a lot. Just- just a few bites. I read it, you know” Niall explains, busying himself so he doesn't have to look up, “I couldn't sleep last night, so I researched it a bit. You don't have to eat a whole meal, just a few bites I guess. But I won't leave you alone for an hour after, just in case.”

 

Louis gulps. He isn't even angry that Niall is intruding anymore. He is just… he doesn't know. He just wasn't expecting it. 

 

“So, these toasts should be fine. They are light and not flavored, you should be able to-”

 

“Stop it, please.”

 

Niall looks up now, it looks like he was crying just two minutes ago, his eyes are bloodshot and his lips dry. “What?” he asks.

 

“Please don't do this. Don't act like you care and don't try to befriend me. I want to be alone, I choose it. And I don't want to eat, I'm the one who decides, and I know what I am doing.”

 

“Louis, you can either eat half of this damn thing or listen while I call mom.”

 

“Then I-”

 

“Then what? You'll tell dad I cried? Go tell him now if you want. I don't care. He hates me already, it won't change anything. I'm failing maths, I won't be able to play this season. He has all the reasons to hate me, your words won't change anything.” Niall is yelling now and Louis looks scared. Niall wonders if he is scared by his tone or the idea of mom knowing. He doesn't care anyway, so he just pushes the plate towards him, smiling a bit when Louis picks a small piece of toast and puts it halfway trough his mouth, still looking at Niall.

 

“Eat.”

 

Louis is on the verge of crying. “I am. I need a moment, please,” he begs, sitting down an taking a deep breath.

 

When Louis’ teeth close around the bread and he takes a bite, Niall begins to talk again.

 

“Mom won't came with me. She has to work and dad said to just drop me off to the hospital, I only have a few checks up today. So that everything is ready for tomorrow.”

 

“It sucks,” Louis replies. His mouth is still full of food, Niall thinks he is trying to make it disappear before swallowing it. 

 

Playing with the hem of his shirt, Niall adds, “She’ll try to come tomorrow. Maybe for when the surgery is done. I'd ask Harry, but I know he is busy, so… could you come today? You don't have to.”

 

Louis would say no, he'd say that Niall doesn't deserve it because he is forcing Louis to eat. “Sure,” he says instead. You can't choose your parents and Niall and Louis have not been so lucky. But that's when friends come in the picture and Harry is the worst ever. Nothing compared to Liam --- and fuck, Louis forgot to tell him he'd skip school.

 

Before Louis can rush upstairs and collect his phone, his doorbell rings and sure enough here is Liam, a worried expression on his face.

  
  
  
  



	8. Harry's reason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall has a doctor appointment and Louis goes with him. He discovers something about Harry.

Liam sighs in relief when he sees Louis standing there. “You are fine,” he states and Louis tries to explain, but before he has a chance to open his mouth, Liam is already babbling, “You weren't in school. You never miss school! I was so worried, I think I called you a hundred times. Why in the hell didn't you answer?”

Louis gives Liam a smile and pats his shoulder, “Everything is fine. I'm going with Niall to the hospital today, he is in the other room,” Louis explains and Liam's face changes immediately.

“You sure this is a good idea? He can go-”

“He can't go alone and I don't want you to tell him otherwise,” Louis says, stopping Liam before he does or says the wrong thing. He likes that Liam cares about him, he really does, but he understands Niall's frustration and Liam doesn't, so he doesn't have any right to talk in this situation.

Thankfully Liam doesn't push it. “How are you going there? Need a ride? I'm out of school anyway.”

Louis guides Liam to the other room, where Niall is sitting, playing on his phone.

“Hi,” Liam greets, a smile plastered on his face, even Louis can tell it’s fake. Niall looks a bit surprised, he rolls his eyes when he recognises Liam and drops his eyes back to his phone.

“Niall, are you okay with Liam coming with us?” Louis asks tentatively. Something is clearly off with Niall and he probably doesn't like the idea of Liam staying with them after how Liam rejected him. But Liam has been so nice, Louis doesn't want to tell him to go home. Deep down Louis thinks that Niall doesn't deserve to be chosen over Liam.

Then why does Louis feel so guilty when his brother looks at him? Niall stares with his mouth slightly open, he wasn't expecting that, it's evident. “I don't care,” he replies quickly. “I need to be there in a hour or so.”

“Then you should get dressed,” Liam tells him, “Need some help?”

“I can dress myself, thank you very much,” Niall snaps, awkwardly standing on his crutches and hobbling away.

Liam shrugs, “I was talking about the stairs.”

The only good thing, Louis thinks, is that everybody forgot breakfast. He can still feel the taste of the only bite of food he had in his mouth and it's enough to make him nauseous.

“Liam, you could be a bit nicer to him,” Louis mumbles, in the nicest voice he can manage. He doesn't want Liam to be angry at him.

Luckily Liam doesn't answer, “I should get dressed too,” he says instead, before Louis follows Niall who is still on the stairs. “Let me help you,” he tells him, grabbing both crutches and holding them in one hand. “Hold on the rail, it's easier,” he explains, grabbing Niall's arm on the other side.

Louis grabs his clothes from his room and heads straight to the bathroom to dress up. He'd never dress in front of his friend nor his brother. He slowly slips off his pajamas, trying to look away from his reflection in the mirror. Liam keeps telling him that there is nothing wrong with his body, that he should learn how to look at his body without any prejudice, but he can't. He thinks about how he looks and already feels like throwing up, he can't stand looking at his body. So he quickly gets his pants and sweather on, only looking in the mirror to fix his hair, as if you could see any difference. His hair is messy anyway, no matter how much he tries to tame it.

Louis walks out of the room, finding a perfectly ready Niall sitting on the bed, as stunning as always, while Liam stands looking out of the window. He can feel that something is going on between them, but he can't quite put his finger on it.

They get in the car, with Niall sitting in the back silently, while Liam and Louis talk about their own things. Liam drops them off but doesn't come with them, saying that he doesn't want to intrude and there are things he has to take care off. Well, Louis knows for a fact that Liam has nothing to do, but Niall drags him away before he can question his friend.

They wait almost half an hour in a room, then a doctor brings Niall somewhere to take a scan, asking Louis to wait. And that's what Louis does, playing on his phone until the battery dies. After a while of staring at the wall he gets bored and goes out the room.

He is walking through the hallway when he spots a familiar figure. “Harry!” he calls, when he is sure he is the one.

In fact Harry turns towards him so quickly that Louis thinks his neck might snap. “It's nice that you came” He still thinks Harry is a horrible person, but maybe he is doing something good for once. Niall might be happy to see him.

“Yeah, I-”

While Harry tries to mumble something a doctor approaches them. “Harry?” he calls, but Harry pretends not to hear him.

“He is talking to you,” Louis says, pointing to the tall doctor.

“Harry, hi! How is my favorite patient today?”

Louis blinks, moving his eyes from the doctor to Harry, who puts his hands in his pockets and looks up. “Uh, I've just arrived actually,” Harry explains.

“See you in a while, then?” the doctor asks and when Harry nods he walks away.

When Harry looks back at Louis they both know there is something to talk about. Louis would lie if he'd say he is not curious, but he isn't that kind of person, he doesn't bug people to know things they obviously don't want to talk about.

“So you are not here for Niall.”

“I'm not. I should go actually,” Harry says quickly, a slight blush covering his cheeks.

Something tells Louis he should just let him go, but there is something else that says he should talk to him. “So you are, like, a patient here?”

“I'm not. Look, Louis, there is a reason I never mentioned coming here. I don't want people to know.”

Louis nods quickly. “Alright, I mean I get it. I won't tell anyone.”

“Means you can't tell Niall either.”

“Sure, but- He is your best friend, isn't he? Maybe you should tell him you are going through something.”

Harry rolls his eyes, “I'm not the patient here, Louis.”

Louis looks at him. Is he serious? The doctor just called him his favorite patient, Louis was there and he isn't deaf or dumb. “Look, Niall is suffering too, and he thinks you don't care about him. If only he'd know...”

“You know what? Come with me.” Harry says, walking through the hallway with no hesitation, he knows exactly where he is going. He stops in front of a room, looking through the window. “He is my brother,” he explains. “That's who I am here for.”

“I'm sorry, is he okay?” Louis asks chewing on his lip. He wasn't expecting this. He can't really see in the room, there is the shape of a boy on the bed, but that's it.

Harry nods, accepting his words. “Want to meet him?”

Louis nods again, even if he's not quite sure if he wants to. He doesn't know why Harry wants him, out of all people, to meet his brother.

Harry knocks on the door, whispering something like, “Go along with what I say,” and cracks the door open.

“Ash?” he calls and the person turns to face them.

Louis can't say he is surprised at all, Harry's brother looks just like him, his hair is simply a lighter shade and he looks younger, but he has the same expression, he is just as hot. “Harry,” he smiles, dimples showing on his cheeks and chin.

“How do you feel, Ash?”

Ash shrugs, trying and failing to adjust himself on the bed. Harry helps him a bit, fixing the pillows so he isn't laying anymore, but is almost sitting. “So, you wanted to meet my friend, right? This is Louis.”

Ash looks at Louis, and Louis feels uncomfortable under his stare. He doesn't like all the attention he is getting, Ash’s eyes are scanning him. It lasts a second or two, but it feels like forever. “Hi,” the boy says eventually.

“Uh, hi.” Louis manages to reply.

“Ashton, you didn't have breakfast,” Harry says, looking at the tray full of food next to Ashton’s bed.

“Tastes horrible.”

Harry sighs, “I'll take you to the cafeteria as long as you eat something. I bet Louis wants to eat too,” Harry says, glancing at Louis to make sure he doesn't say otherwise.

Louis wants to say that no, he doesn't want to eat, but Ashton nods, allowing Harry to help him up. Or at least that's what Louis thought. Harry grabs the sheets, pulling them away and uncovering Ashton, then he guides his legs over the side of the bed and grabs a wheelchair from the corner of the room. Louis hadn't even seen it. He holds his breath while Harry picks up Ashton, sitting him on the chair, crouching in front of him to fix his feet on the footrest.

“You good?” he asks and Ashton nods, staring at his hands on his lap while Harry wheels him with Louis following. “Don't stare at him like that,” Harry whispers and Louis can feel how he already regrets bringing Louis in the room.

Harry walks to the cafeteria, once again knowing exactly where it is. He sets Ashton next to a table. “What do you want?”

“I don't want to eat.”

“Fine, I'll choose. What about you, Lou?”

“Lou?” Louis repeats out loud, then he remembers that Harry said they were friends. “Oh, I'll come with you,” he says quickly as they walk over to the queue.

“So I'm your friend now.”

“Look, it's complicated. Ashton wanted to meet my friends, but no one knows about him, I thought, since you already knew-”

Louis waves with his hand to shush him. “I get it. But why don't you tell Niall?”

“I wanted to. Really I did, but Niall got hurt two days after Ashton’s accident and I didn't want to stress him with my problems. Ashton is not doing good, anyway. He- the doctor says he won't walk again, he didn't take it well.”

“I'm sorry.” Louis replies sadly. Ashton doesn't look like someone who just got the news he can't walk. Niall made a scene for a twisted knee, while the boy seemed calm about the whole thing. But maybe he is in some sort of traumatic denial, Louis can't be sure.

“Anyway, what are you eating?” Harry asks.

Louis replies he is not hungry, obviously, but Harry orders three toasts, claiming he has to eat or Ashton won't.

When they get their toasts, they go back to the table, Louis isn't the only one who looks at his food wishing it would disappear.

“Ash, please,” Harry whines, shifting on his chair to be closer to his brother. He grabs the piece of bread and puts it in Ashton’s hand. Ashton slowly brings it to his mouth but after a few bites, the bread falls off his hands, crumbling into the plate and Ashton grunts, blinking away the tears forming in his eyes.

Louis can't stop staring, even if he feels like he is invading someone else's privacy. Harry collects the bread, grabbing Ashton’s hand again, but the boy doesn't hold the food. “Stop it. I'm not hungry anyway.”

“Ash, you can't stop eating.”

“Wanna bet?”

Harry is about to answer, but just then Ashton’s whole body shakes and he starts crying in a way that physically hurts Louis. “I- I think I should go now.” Louis says and stands up before Harry can turn in his direction.

He almost runs out of the cafeteria, finding Niall's room again. He has no idea how long he has been away. He has no idea of what happened after he left, or why he had to pretend to be Harry's friend, why Harry let him meet his brother, what's even wrong with him ? Louis slowly paces his heartbeat and opens the door, not sure if Niall is already inside. Maybe he regrets leaving Harry alone while his brother was having a breakdown, but it's too late now.

 

\---

I'm sorry it took me so long to update, I'm doing my best.  
So...

What do you think about Harry's brother? And what about Louis meeting him? Do you think Harry will tell Niall?

**Author's Note:**

> This is the begin inning. .. why do you think about it si far?
> 
> Like... How long will Niall and Louis last living together before they kill each other?
> 
> Do you think what you read is the only reason they hate each other so much?
> 
> What is going to happen with Niall's knee? 
> 
> And what's wrong with Louis? Why does he have bruises?
> 
> You'll find it out later on!
> 
> Libs_


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